Why didn’t anyone write about this? Why didn’t anybody tell me? This hurts. Preparing to go on the trail, to say goodbye to the people that you love, hurts. I’ll only be gone for 6 months, but that’s a long time for families that are close!
As a military wife, I know from deployments that for the people at home, this trip will fly by while simultaneously (as if it were some cruel joke) time will also manage to drag on. I know there will be stages of sadness and loneliness, stages that may manifest themselves as panic or anger (and sometimes temporary resentment). I know there will be concerns for our safety. I know there will be frustration and disappointment when we miss major celebrations. I know these things. I’ve been on that side 4 times while Ben was overseas. My heart breaks to know I am putting the people that I love most in this world through all of that.
But I also have gratitude. Because despite their pain, I see their choice to be selfless during this journey by their willingness to stand behind us. Our families support us because they care about us. They want Ben and I to fully achieve the versions of ourselves that we long to be. Their encouragement and sacrifice embodies the way we all ought to live our lives – lifting up one another with generous hearts.
In a video I watched recently, a man named Ted said, “None of us make it into life or through life on our own.” He’s absolutely right. We are intended to be in communities, we need each other. Dreams are rarely achieved without support; without a mound of people holding you, helping you, guiding you, or cheering you on.
Whether they are blood relations or not, Ben and I are lucky to call many family. We are lucky to love and be loved abundantly.
I fully expect one of the hardest days on the trail to be day number 1. The day I have to turn and hike away. However, what will keep me going is the thought that in 2,190 miles I get to have a champagne party with all of the people I hold dear.
I’m doing this for me. No one else. But can do it because of family. Because of friends. Because of the people in my life who cheer me on. And, holy cow, I can’t wait to celebrate with them all!
-k